


Looking Back At My Imprisonment

by MonsieurMadeleine



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies)
Genre: M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Newt Scamander's Niffler Sees Too Much, POV Niffler, Rape, Revenge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-10-02 05:22:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10210493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonsieurMadeleine/pseuds/MonsieurMadeleine
Summary: Niffler attends to Newt's funeral. He is thinking about his memories with Newt and about avenging him.Formerly titled: 'For You, Mommy'





	1. Today

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niffler has a hard time saying goodbye to Newt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to prevent an confusion, I'm going to tell how the story works. I start with Today, then the story goes back in time. After that we go back to the future. We jump from past to future and back.

The last night, the seconds crept by. My mind just wouldn't stop reliving the moment that I was dragged out of the case and saw Mommy's dead body. He was chained to the wall, his head hung low. First I hoped he was just unconscious, but that Grindelwald guy stated he was dead. Mommy was dead... I just couldn't believe it, but it's true. I feel a sting in my heart every time I think about it. Grindelwald will pay!

Sadly I sit in Tina's arms as I watch how the men lower Mommy's coffin into a huge hole, dug for this occasion. They'll place a beautiful, stone monument for Mommy on that thing that they call a grave. At least that's what Tina and Queenie keep telling me. A stone... How could that suffice? Mommy deserves much more praise, more love than what he gets now. Of course, no one but Tina, Queenie and me know how brave he was, standing Grindelwald's tortures, but still. Mommy is so much more than what the government can see.

The tears spilling out of Tina's eyes land on my snout, and as I rub them away, I draw Queenie's attention to me. She ruffles my fur. Normally, I'd be awfully insulted, but now I don't care. I don't have to look nice anymore. Mommy's gone. He's dead.

'I know it's incredibly hard for you too, little buddy' Queenie says, still ruffling my fur. Thankfully I grab the shiny coin she gives me, my eyes still on Mommy's coffin, which is now lowered into the ground. I just watch as men start to fill the grave up.

And now I wish I could speak like humans do. I wish I could say a few words to Mommy. I only need four words: 'I love you, Mommy'. The only option I have, is sending the message to him in thought. Talking isn't meant for creatures like me. We aren't supposed to communicate with the human kind.

'Darling' Tina says, seconds later. 'You little boy... You miss him too, don't you?' Tina kisses my snout. Still, my eyes can't leave the grave.

'We should go' says Queenie after observing me, staring at the grave. 'The poor little guy is going depressive.'

Then that's what the ladies do. With me still in her arms, Tina walks away from the grave.

And then the president walks up to us. 'I'm so incredibly sorry' she says. 'This wasn't supposed to happen. But you are incredibly strong-willed, both of you. And of course you too.' Saying that, the president pets my snout. In anger I make a biting motion to her. But she sees it as playing. 'You're such a big boy, aren't you? Isn't he, people?'

Laughing, she turns to the other people, and that's the moment that I notice that she isn't alone. The whole government is here too. I don't know what they are doing here. They didn't care at the moment that they could save Mommy, me and the other creatures, and now they feel sorry. Now they try to make it up to Tina, Queenie and me by saying kind words and acting as if they are sorry at all.

'Just leave us' Tina snarls, not giving the president any chance to react before she walks off, keeping her calm - or she tries to. The tears run down her cheeks as she hisses 'Why won't she just leave us alone?'

'Ssh, Teenie. It's alright. Queenie's arm embraces Tina's shoulders as they walk inside, with me in their arms.

***

It's a week later, but my pain hasn't ceased the smallest bit.

Time creeps by if the emotional pain tries to kill you. There's no escape to it. Everything in the house reminds me of Mommy. His bedroom, my bedroom, any room. His old but still shiny watch, his shiny money that the Goldstein sisters gave me - everything. I can't do anything without thinking back at the times that I did that with Mommy. Seeing the Goldstein sisters even hurts, knowing how close Mommy was with them.

That's the moment when I decide that I can't live like this anymore. I have to say goodbye to everything I knew in this house. This warm, lovely house. It hurts, but I don't have any choice. Fast, I stuff Mommy's watch, the shiny money and Mommy's silver ring into the little pouch on my stomach.

Without warning anyone, I flee out of the house. I don’t want to look the Goldstein sisters in the eyes anymore. I just can’t bear it anymore. It’s… Mommy… I don’t want to live without Mommy, but I’ll have to. Committing suicide isn’t what Mommy wants me to do. He wants me to live on, to have courage, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do now. I have to go.

The first step on the cold stone makes me realize what I’m doing. I’m going to leave all comfort and luxury, searching for a way to say goodbye to Mommy. Dear Mommy…

Wait a moment! Mommy didn’t have to die. That Grindelwald killed him, after making him suffer, so now I’ll do that to him, and to that other guy who Grindelwald called Credence. I will avenge Mommy. He will be proud of me.

Slowly, I walk across the street. Without caring about the cars. Of course I remember how the building looked, and of course where it was.

Carefully I walk over the streets, afraid to be noticed, but luckily, humans don’t look at the street but at the other people. From far, I can see the building. My anger grows. That place is the place Mommy died. And to make it worse, that Grindelwald lied about Mommy’s death too. He said that he found Mommy in the streets, raped and beaten. He said he tried to save him, but that it was too late. Of course he lies, but everyone believes him as long as he’s disguised as some Graves guy.


	2. Earlier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niffler's first flashback.

Suddenly I’m lifted up from my pile of shiny treasures to float out of my little cave. Desperately, I try to get hold of something, anything. A small coin is all I am able to get hold of until the cave is out of arm’s reach. While my fear grows larger and larger, I push the coin in my pocket, not wanting to part with it. At a high speed, I move to the opening of the case to float out.

The room is dark. A small light bulb hangs above my head. The room is small, the walls are completely white. Mommy’s eyes stare at me, his eyes pooled with tears.

Mommy’s on his knees, and he’s begging. He begs the guy with the white hair to let me go, to let all of the creatures go. The guy holding me up with his spell only laughs at it.

‘Sh, Mr. Scamander. If you really want your creatures to survive, then do exactly as I say, and nothing else. You know I’m true to my word, but you also know that I won’t be merciful once you provoke me.’ The man with the white hair makes me float closer to him, almost at arm’s reach. ‘Come on, Newt. Decide, now.’

‘Don’t hurt my creatures and I’ll do anything you ask of me, really. Please, Grindelwald.’ The name comes out quiet as a summer breeze. And yet again, Grindelwald – or whatever the man’s name is, only laughs.

‘Just do as I say, or else –’ Grindelwald stops in the middle of his sentence, almost as if he remembers something, or tries to remember it. ‘Do as I say or you’ll be lucky if I give you the creature’s shiny stuff.’ Grindelwald grabs me by my feet and holds me upside down, shaking just a little, but rough enough to make the coin fall out. Grindelwald picks up the coin, still holding me upside down. He throws the coin to Mommy, who is only capable of staring at it.

‘Please don’t hurt him, please.’ Mommy’s tears drop on the floor.

‘Do as I say, Newt, or he’ll suffer the Cruciatus Curse.’

‘No! I’ll do anything, anything!’ Mommy tries to get up, but with a wave of Grindelwald’s hand, he’s blown against the wall. With a groan, he sinks to the floor, his tears increasing their speed.

‘Now undress, Newt. Come on.’

‘Please, don’t make me do that, please.’ Mommy looks at us, or at me. In the meantime, Grindelwald has been cradling me like a baby, but still, no one’s like Mommy. I’ll never be able to rest peacefully in the arms of that monster, that man who hurts Mommy.

‘Undress, Newt, or I’ll make you watch as I make your darling creature suffer!’ Grindelwald’s brows knit together in a frown, his eyes like those of a puppy. ‘And we wouldn’t want your creatures to get hurt, would we?’

‘Please…’

‘Okay then. Prepare for the cruelest torture in the Wizarding History.’

‘No! I’ll do anything you say!’ With the tears still rolling down his face, Mommy removes his jacket. And then his other smaller jacket. And then his tie. After that, he removes the blouse, revealing a beautiful chest and stomach. But he is hesitant to remove his shoes until Grindelwald adds another threat. That’s the last straw; Mommy gives in, pulling off his shoes and removing his trousers. Mommy squeezes his eyes shut as he pushes his underpants down, revealing his naked cock. ‘Niffler, please look away. This…’ Mommy says until he’s cut of by Grindelwald.

‘Good job, Newt. Now, on your knees.’ Grindelwald drops me on the case, and then he unbuckles his belt and his cock directly jumps up, right in front of Mommy’s face. ‘Come on. Don’t tell me you don’t know what to do.’ Grindelwald wraps his fingers in Mommy’s hair, forcing him to look in his eyes.

‘Grindelwald… Don’t think –’

Grindelwald’s cock is pushed in Mommy’s mouth. Mommy gags as the tears roll down his face even faster. Grindelwald moans as his cock goes in and out of Mommy’s mouth. Mommy tries to speak, but the cock in his mouth blocks every sound.

It feels like hours later when Grindelwald pulls his cock out of Mommy’s mouth. He strokes his cock a few times before he comes, the come spreading over Mommy’s face. Mommy sputters, trying to pull back. Unfortunately, to no avail, thanks to the hand in his neck, holding him in place.

‘Good, and now, on your hands and knees.’ Grindelwald pushes Mommy off, making him moan in pain.

‘Please…’ Mommy begs.

‘I didn’t ask you to beg, you brat!’ Grindelwald hisses. ‘I told you to sit on your hands and knees. Is begging and moaning a part of that?’

‘No.’

‘And I don’t like it when you call me Grindelwald. I’d rather have you calling me Master. So we’ll try again. Is begging and moaning a part of that?’

‘No Master.’ Mommy sighs.

‘You aren’t unthankful to me, are you?’

‘No Master.’

Grindelwald’s cock is still hard, and he pushes the hard cock into Mommy’s ass, but not before spitting on his hand and spreading his spit over his cock. Mommy’s cry of pain just tears my heart apart, Grindelwald’s moans of pleasure anger me. Grindelwald’s thrusts are fast and sharp. His cock fully disappears in Mommy’s ass, a sight that makes me tremble in fear and anger. The anger is only worsened by the small amount of blood running down Mommy’s inner thighs. Mommy just can’t stop crying out in pain, even though his voice is hoarse from the crying and the cock in his throat.

Again it feels like hours before Grindelwald comes, but this time, he stays inside Mommy. And after coming, he collapses on Mommy.

‘Please…’ Mommy begs. I don’t know what he begs for, but I think it’s about the safety of his creatures.

‘Sh, I’m not yet done. Don’t worry.’ Grindelwald flips Mommy on his back and then he enters roughly, making Mommy cry out, yet again.


	3. Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niffler does a short investigation in the house.

Soundless, I slip between people ‘s legs, trying to get to the building as soon as possible, but to no avail. My hurry only seems to slow the process down, and that’s exactly what I don’t want. But who am I to complain; I decided to go on this journey myself. No-one forced me to, and yet, I left my warm house. Willingly, I left the house where it’s warm, comfortable and above everything, save.

After a long time of slaloming between people’s legs, I’m finally close to my destination. In an alley, there’s a little crack in the wall through which I managed to escape. I remember how I squeezed through and ran for my life and that of the other creatures. No, I didn’t have to run for Mommy’s life anymore for he was already dead. How scary it was, squeezing through the door just before it slammed shut. I remember hiding in the shadows, sprinting off every time Grindelwald almost caught me. It’s impossible that he never noticed anything, but he didn’t suspect it was me. He didn’t expect any creature, let alone MACUSA standing at his doorstep barely an hour later.

Actually, I don’t know how that Grindelwald guy is doing right now, but I don’t care either. I hope someone close to Mommy snaps and hurts him. They’re allowed to use the unforgivable curses for my sake. He’s allowed to suffer a bit, even if it’s only a small part of what Mommy went through. But I know it won’t hurt him. I won’t change anything. He’ll still laugh right in everyone’s face just like he did when MACUSA appeared at his doorstep. His behavior will never change. He’ll always be that same guy.

Knowing that I’m nearing the place in which I’ve been captured for so long, I squeeze through the little crack in the wall. Directly, I recognize the hall. I remember how I ran and how the red wall scared me with its bloody color. The color which I thought looked like the blood on Mommy’s back once I was pulled out of the case for the thousandth time, this time to see how Mommy’s hung limply in the chains, the chains being the only thing keeping his corpse from falling to the floor.

Even though Grindelwald is gone en he can’t hurt me anymore, I still shiver in fear, afraid to make any sound at all. Every step makes an echo go through the huge hall. Every little sound makes me turn around, scanning the whole hall in fear, afraid that Grindelwald has returned, or that someone is looking for me. But every time, it turns out to be the wind, my own footsteps echoing or my fur brushing the wall.

Suddenly, I realize something: in a rush, I just rushed somewhere, not caring to look where I went at all. Now I have to find the room where I was locked up with Mommy and the case using only my instinct. I have no idea where it can be, but if I managed to get out, I must be able to back in too.

First I go to the right, and then again to the right. And then I end up in a living room. The problem is that I’ve only been able to study the room in which I was locked up. I had too many time to do that, to be honest. But I didn’t have any time to investigate any other room or hall, resulting in me panicking in the huge building with no clue where to go.

With a sigh of desperation, I sit on the fauteuil. Tired of the running and the emotion, I rest my back against the cool leather of the fauteuil, the fatigue threatening to overtake me. And then I close my eyes for a brief moment, or that was my plan.

***

Grindelwald is standing in front of me, and then he grabs me. He laughs an evil laugh.

‘You’ll never be able to let your Newt go!’ he laughs. ‘You’ll always grief for him!’

***

What was that? A nightmare, luckily. A bit scared, I run back to the little crack. I run, almost as if I’m afraid that there’s something following me. I have to be honest: being with Tina, Queenie and Jacob is a better idea than staying here. What if there’s really someone in there? I decide that I’ll go home. I’ll investigate later.

With a nasty feeling that I’m being followed, I run. The street’s seem to have lengthened as I keep on running. I just can’t stop running until I’m at the door of Tina and Queenie’s apartment. With my feet still desperate to get me further from the dark building that was once our cage, I bump into the door. Luckily, Tina opens the door, and I slip inside, thankful for the warmth and the safety.

‘Where were you?’ Queenie asks, placing me on her lap. ‘We were so worried about you!’ With a sigh, Jacob ruffles my fur, a faint smile on his face. Tina joins us and takes a book out of her pocket. Probably the book Newt used to note the instructions for the caretaking for the creatures. After reading the instructions for my food, Tina stands up again to prepare the food.

After a few minutes of loud noise in the kitchen, Tina returns, putting my food on the table. Thankful, I jump on the table and I start to eat as Tina, Queenie and Jacob watch me eat. After I finish, I settle on the couch, closing my eyes for another nap. A more peaceful and fearless sleep. A sleep without nightmares.

Desperate for a good nap, I close my eyes. Queenie’s hands pick me up and place me on her lap. She cradles me like a baby as I drift off to sleep. The slight cradling calms me. It lets me know I’m not alone and that nothing can hurt me.


	4. Earlier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The rape continues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm starting to annoy myself on the computer because it just won't accept the words "Grindelwald" and "Niffler".

Grindelwald pounds into Mommy merciless, ignoring Mommy’s tears and begging. Mommy’s terrified eyes just can’t look away from Grindelwald’s which are filled with lust and possibly anger. Why would anyone hurt someone as kind and caring as Mommy? If you’d rape a criminal or something like it, I might be able to understand it, or at least be at peace with it, but someone as kind as Mommy doesn’t deserve to go through such pain.

‘Please, Master!’ Mommy cries out as Grindelwald thrusts in again. ‘Please! Please let me go, or at least –’ Grindelwald’s hand covers Mommy’s mouth. His angry hand pushes Mommy’s head against the floor, earning a muffled moan of pain for it and a angry look from me.

‘I didn’t ask you to beg and nag, did I?’ he asks, angered too. ‘You shouldn’t be so stubborn: you’ll never escape from here. You’ll always be my prisoner because I’ll never let you go. And if you don’t shut up immediately, I’ll make your creatures suffer, and I know you wouldn’t want that. Neither do I, to be honest.’ And then Grindelwald’s hand leaves Mommy’s mouth to concentrate on the thrusting into Mommy’s ass again. The idea makes me nauseous, and yet I can’t run away from the horrible sight. ‘Come on, Newt. Don’t be so shy, darling. Beg me to fuck you harder.’

‘No, please.’ Mommy looks away, straight into my eyes. That seems to calm Mommy a bit. He sighs and closes his eyes. ‘Do it, fuck me.’ I can see how it hurts Mommy to say it, but he knows that if he don’t his creatures will suffer, and he’d do anything to prevent that. And that Grindelwald guy knows it which results in him being even crueler to Mommy, adding more salt to the wounds.

‘Come on, darling. You know you can’t hide your secret desires for long. I’ll always find them, just as I find your fear.’ Grindelwald lowers his face so his nose is almost touching Mommy’s cheek. ‘You know you’ll succumb to me one day. You’ll be begging me for the so long wanted sexual pleasure. You’ll be on your knees begging me. You know you will, but you’re too stubborn to actually give in, even though you know it’s inevitable.’

‘No. I’ll never give in to you!’ Mommy pushes Grindelwald off, surprising Grindelwald, me and himself. Mommy pushes himself against the wall, still afraid of Grindelwald. ‘You’re not going to touch me again! Stay away from me!’ Mommy’s eyes search for something, anything to protect himself with, but the only thing in the room is his own case of creatures, and I know that he won’t use that to hit Grindelwald, probably because the creatures inside will feel it if the plan fails.

‘I see you looking at that case, Newt. But unfortunately, you know that you won’t use it to attack just as well as I do because you know that those creatures are going to feel it you fail. They’ll have to pay for your escape attempt. And you wouldn’t want that. I know you wouldn’t, and thus –’

‘Don’t even try to hurt my creatures! I’ll stay with you and I won’t try to escape if you’d only let me see my creatures. If you let me see them, I’ll let you do anything to me. I’ll let you fuck me and everything. I’ll suck your cock and… Just let me see my creatures. Let me take care of them, please.’

‘Fine. For two hours. And after that, you’ll have to come back when I knock on the case. Don’t try to bring any creature up here because I’ll tie you up and force you to watch how I torture the poor creature with the Cruciatus Curse. You do understand, don’t you,, or do I need to remind you?’

‘No. You don’t have to remind me of the Curse’s abilities. I already know. You don’t have to tell. I’ll be back on time and… I’ll do anything you ask. Tell me to spread my legs and I’ll do so. Tell me to suck your cock and I’ll do so. Really. But may I have my clothes back before I go into the case. I think my creatures won’t like it if I go in there naked.’

‘Of course, my dear.’ Grindelwald throws Mommy his clothes. Thankful, he pulls them on, and for a brief moment I forget everything that happened in the past minutes. For a few seconds, I see a strong, well-built young man who’s biggest passion is his creatures, but slowly, the idealistic view disappears again and I’m back to reality: we’re in Grindelwald’s secret location, and in two hours or so, Mommy has to spread his legs for one of the worst wizards on earth: Grindelwald.

Mommy, however, doesn’t care about his current location. The only thing on his mind is getting into his case to take care of his creatures, to pet them and to talk to them. And to be honest: We haven’t been out of the case for so incredibly long, but I’m all too happy to get back in the case. I just can’t wait to get to my treasures again. My lovely shining treasures that I left being lifted away not even ten minutes ago.

With me in his hand, Mommy enters his case. He sighs in relief as he enters his small hut. Carefully he places me in my cave. As if I have been parted from it for ages, I grab as much stuff as I can to push into my pouch, not knowing when I’ll be able to be here again after we go back to Grindelwald. I won’t let Mommy go alone.

Mommy looks so happy, being able to see his creatures for some time. Even if it’s just two hours. Mommy prepares the food for the creatures with a smile. Unfortunately, that happy feeling will have to move aside for a feeling of fear in a few hours.


	5. Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Niffler has bad dreams, but eventually, he'll fall asleep, or so he hopes.

Suddenly I’m awoken by Queenie. She stands up with me in her arms, and then she brings me to a bedroom. It’s Mommy’s bedroom, and Queenie knows that. And yet she lays me in the bed carefully, making sure I’m not cold. It doesn’t take long for me to sink into a deep sleep, but unfortunately, it isn’t as peaceful as I might want it to be.

***

Grindelwald towers over me. His hand grabs me out of the bed and he holds me close to his face. Almost desperately, I try to escape, but to no avail. Grindelwald won’t release me and I know that.

‘You know that I’ve won. You know that you’ll never be able to let Newt go. You’ll always grief for him, want him back. And the Goldstein sisters are going to miss him so badly, and don’t forget that No-Maj of his. He’ll feel so sorry that he couldn’t help his friend that only kept him around because he was so pathetic on his own. And I didn’t even speak about MACUSA. Their feeling of guilt will grow and grow, and eventually the guilt will tear it apart.’

Angered by Grindelwald’s words, I try to bite him, but he won’t be bitten. He slaps my on my snout, making me shake my head a bit. If I could cry, I’d be crying every little drop of liquid out right now. No-one has the right to speak about Mommy the way he does. He doesn’t know how Mommy truly is. Mommy was – is one of the best people New York has ever seen, and yet, MACUSA only stepped in when Mommy already died.

In frustration, I try to hit Grindelwald, but he only laughs, just as he did when MACUSA appeared at his doorstep to arrest him. He does – however fight back now. I know that the change of actually hitting him is incredibly tiny, I keep on hitting him, or trying to. But to no avail, unfortunately.

‘You’ll never hit me, darling. Just accept that Newt is dead and that he’s not coming back. You lost him and you’ll never get him back. No amount of aggression can change me, and it won’t bring Newt back either, so just accept it. Tina, Queenie and Jacob will accept it too, eventually, so why would you keep on fighting?’

***

Suddenly I fall to the ground with a loud smack. Why was Grindelwald in here? How did he get here? With a sigh, I realize that it was just a nightmare and that there’s nothing wrong and nothing to worry about. Jacob appearing in the bedroom calms me down. Grindelwald was never in my bedroom; it was just a nightmare.

‘Calm down, buddy. You don’t have to worry ‘cause we’re here.’ Jacob picks me up and takes me with him to his bed. He lays me next to him on the cushion and falls asleep quickly. Even though I know that I’m save, I can’t sleep. It’s dark and silent, the perfect circumstances for a good night sleep, and yet I’m afraid.

And then I settle down. It isn’t useful at all if I keep on panicking through the night. It’ll only bring me sleepless nights, but nothing else. But even with those thoughts in my head, I wonder how Jacob can fall asleep so easily, even though the bed is soft and he’s sleepy as hell. I’m sleepy too, I won’t deny that – and yet I can’t sleep. I just can’t stop reliving the moment I discovered Mommy was truly dead. Jacob never saw Mommy’s dead body, or at least not seconds after his death, his back covered in blood and his eyes squinted shut in fear and pain. For his funeral, he was all cleaned up and dressed in chic clothing. But I know what’s hidden beneath that clothes.

With a sigh, I close my eyes, but then there’s another feeling beside fear: wonder. Will I ever be able to let Mommy go, or at least not be so incredibly sad. Of course, I know that I’ll never let him go forever, and he’ll always be in my mind, even if I’m happy with Tina, Queenie and Jacob, but I need to be able to do something, anything without longing for Mommy at my side.

***

Maybe it’s one hour later, or maybe two. I’ve been asleep for brief moments, but I’d be wide awake one or two minutes later. In silence, I stare at Jacob who doesn’t notice anything. He’s fast asleep, and I don’t think he’s going to wake up before dawn. Not that I care, because I don’t want people bending over me, wondering what’s going on in my head and what’s wrong with me.

Maybe I should… No, I’m not taking a walk. I’ve been scared enough by the shadows out there. Those shadows will always haunt me for I’ll always see Grindelwald appearing in it. I’ll never forget that smile, that evil smile.

Time passes by and I’m getting sleepier by the second, and yet, sleep won’t come. At least no real sleep. I’d be awake every one or two minutes, reliving the fear during my imprisonment. Nothing will ever change that. But hopefully, I’ll be able to let go of that someday and sleep like I did before Grindelwald changed my whole life and that of Tina, Queenie and Jacob.

***

It’s morning. I managed to fall asleep somehow. I was awoken by Jacob. Jacob petted me and told me to get up because Tina had my food ready. Unfortunately, I don’t feel like I can eat anything because I’m still incredibly tired. Actually, I want to get back to bed, even though I know that I won’t be able to sleep.

In silence, we eat, and there it comes again; a huge, sad feeling. Mommy should have been here. I’d normally be on Mommy’s lap during breakfast, but now I’m sitting on Jacob’s lap. Of course, he’s comfortable too, but not like Mommy.


	6. Earlier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grindelwald threatens to hurt Niffler, but Newt interferes, spreading his legs for Grindelwald "willingly".

Unbelievable how fast the two hours in the case fly. Before I know it, I hear a knock on the lid of the case, and then Mommy runs to the entrance. He wants to climb up to the entrance, but not before I grab his trousers. Mommy picks me up and walks me back to my cave. He puts me in my cave and pushes a coin in my hand.

‘Niffler, you have to stay, please.’ Mommy’s voice breaks. A tear runs down his face as he turns away, but I dump the coin and jump on Mommy’s shoulder, but Mommy places me back into the cave. ‘No, Niffler. I’m sorry, but I don’t want Grindelwald to hurt you. I’d never forgive myself if he managed to hurt you, physically or mentally.’ Again Mommy turns his back to me, but again I jump on his shoulder, and this time I don’t let him put me back into my cave. I grab his arm before he can let go of me. ‘Let go, Niffler, please. Grindelwald will hurt you if you come with me.’ Stubbornly, I shake my head, my grip on his arm tightening so he can’t pull his arm back without me hanging on to him. ‘Let me go, please.’ And yet, I won’t stop shaking my head.

For my idea, it takes minutes to convince Mommy to take me with him. With a sigh, he puts me in his pocket. As he walks to the entrance again, he folds his hand protectively over the opening of his pocket. That doesn’t mute the sound of another knock on the lid of the case.

‘Listen to me, Newt. I don’t want to go down there, and you wouldn’t want that either, because I’ll find you, and I’ll kill every creature I find on my way.’ Grindelwald’s voice echoes through the case which makes Mommy run to the opening. And then he climbs up to the entrance where Grindelwald waits for him. Against the protests of Mommy’s hand, I stick my head out of the pocket, just in time to see Grindelwald smacking Mommy in his face. Mommy trips over his case and then he falls to the ground, and I bounce out of Mommy’s pocket, and unfortunately, Grindelwald sees me. ‘So you did try to get out of here, didn’t you?’

‘No, Grindelwald’, Mommy answers, his voice trembling slightly in fear. ‘I would never… Niffler can’t harm anyone… He’s just searching for something shiny to pocket… Please don’t hurt my creatures, and especially not him.’ Mommy tries to move backwards, but Grindelwald uses his wandless magic to hold Mommy in place.

‘Who said I’d hurt your creatures? I told you that I’d hurt them if I had to come into that case to search for you, but I didn’t have to. And I am allowed to change the rules according to my taste.’ Grindelwald pulls his wand out and then he aims at Mommy. ‘Crucio!’ he hisses, and then Mommy cries out, his body shaking violently.

‘Please, Grindelwald! Please!’ Mommy keeps on shaking violently, the tears appearing in his eyes as the curse is followed by another, and a dozen more. Blinded by anger, I attack Grindelwald. I jump on him, and then his wand is aimed at me. Scared, I step back, afraid that he’ll attack me. ‘No, Grindelwald. You’re not going to hurt Niffler. Niffler, hide. Go back into the case. I don’t want him to hurt you.’ And yet, I don’t climb back into the case; on the contrary, I stand on the case. ‘Niffler, go back in the case, now.’ Mommy’s so scared, and yet I don’t obey.

‘I think your little creature wants to be tortured a bit. He just won’t obey you and he’s trying to provoke me. Don’t deny, Newt, because you know he wants a good torture.’

‘I’ll… I promised you to spread my legs for you once I got to see my creatures, and I’m back and willing. Come on, do anything to me. Fuck me, make me suck your cock, just don’t hurt Niffler. I’ll do anything, really.’ Mommy kneels in front of Grindelwald and opens his trousers, taking out his cock and kissing it gently. Even though it disgusts me, I can’t look away. I just keep staring as Mommy licks Grindelwald’s full cock. Mommy’s tongue travels from Grindelwald’s balls up to the tip. The ignores the pre-cum on the head and sucks it, ignoring the pleasured moaning from Grindelwald.

It doesn’t take long before Grindelwald decides that the foreplay is over and that the real work must begin. Ignoring Mommy’s noise of protest, Grindelwald crams his cock into Mommy’s mouth. Mommy gags helplessly, but he tries to please Grindelwald. Luckily, Grindelwald doesn’t care. The only thing he cares about is pleasing his cock.

And then, Grindelwald cries out. ‘Swallow it, darling’, Grindelwald whispers, but still, Mommy coughs it up as soon as Grindelwald’s cock withdraws, angering Grindelwald. ‘I told you to swallow it!’ he hisses, his cock spraying even more come in Mommy’s mouth, holding his hand on Mommy’s nose, resulting in Mommy swallowing it all. ‘And now, I’d like some real action. Undress.’

Slightly reluctant, Mommy does as he’s told. Mommy undresses and spreads his legs for Grindelwald. Thankfully, Grindelwald settles between Mommy’s legs and then his cock enters Mommy’s ass. Relentlessly, Grindelwald thrusts into Mommy’s ass. Mommy cries out in pain, but his cries of pain are ignored. The only thing Grindelwald cares about is adding salt to Mommy’s wounds.

‘Come on, Newt. Beg me to fuck you, to cum in you.’

‘Please Grindelwald. Fuck me, come in me. Release me, please.’ Mommy wants it to be over, but he knows that Grindelwald doesn’t want it to be over. Grindelwald could fuck Mommy all day, but not today; Grindelwald leaves. Mommy’s still lying there on the floor, naked and ashamed. Grindelwald shuts the door behind him, and I nuzzle to Mommy’s chest as Mommy cries into my fur, his tears making a wet spot.


	7. Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another nightmare.

‘Promise me you’ll never just leave again, because we were so incredibly worried’, Queenie says as she stands up. She pets my head before kissing Jacob. In the meantime, I learned that they’re married three days before Mommy’s death and that they’re with child now. Even that news can’t get my mind off of Mommy. Of course I’m happy for them because being with child is one of the best things that can happen to you, but that can’t replace my feelings for Mommy.

‘And I think our little baby is going to love you.’ Jacob ruffles my fur.

Apparently, Queenie can read minds of magical creatures too. ‘But our child won’t change Niffler’s feelings for Newt. Niffler will never be able to let go of Newt. Newt was everything to him.’

‘Of course that won’t change my feelings about Newt either, love, but… We have to get on with our lives, for… We can’t just… There must be some happiness in your life too. If you only stick to the negative, the negativity will change into a cloud hanging over your life. And I wouldn’t want that. I prefer a shining sun.’

With a sigh, I sit down next to Jacob. I want the sun to shine too, but… Mommy was everything to me. I couldn’t live without him… He was the man that fed me, that took care of me, that loved me. Of course, Tina, Queenie and Jacob love me too, but still, it’s not like Mommy’s love. Mommy died trying to guarantee the safety of his creatures.

Should I go back to the building? Probably not. It’s barely bearable to be in the building where Grindelwald tortured Mommy to death. If I try, I can remember Mommy’s voice, begging Grindelwald to be merciful to his creatures. Mommy said that he’d do anything to guarantee the safety of his creatures. And Grindelwald took full advantage of that, forcing Mommy to pleasure him.

After a few minutes of thinking it over, I decide that I’m not going back to the building, or at least, not today. Of course, I’ll go there again someday, but not today. I’ll go back to that building once I’ve been able to accept Mommy’s death. Going to the building in the state I’m in now, won’t help me any further in the process of saying goodbye to Mommy. On the contrary; it’d only upset me again, making me think back to the years in which Mommy and I were side to side, trying to stand Grindelwald’s threats and tortures. With a lot of effort, Mommy convinced Grindelwald to let me stay with him, knowing that I wouldn’t do harm.

And before I know it, I fall asleep again, resulting in awful nightmares, again.

***

Grindelwald looks at me, smiling like he always does.

‘It’s hard, isn’t it?’ he teases. ‘It’s hard to say goodbye to Newt, and it’ll never be easy. You’ll always long for his loving care and his sweet words, and you know just as well as I do, that nobody will ever be the same as you dear Mommy. Tina, Queenie and Jacob may be kind to you, and they may try to do anything to make you feel comfortable, but you know that you’ll always long for your Mommy. And as I’m talking about Tina, she’ll always regret that they didn’t marry. She’ll be staring at her hand, imaging a wedding ring around her finger, a ring similar to her sister’s.’

Even though I know it’s true, I shake my head, denying it. How hard it may be, I’m not going to give in to Grindelwald’s vicious mind games.

‘You know that I’m right. And I’ll tell you more. Jacob will always feel guilty because he already thought Newt would be with me, but he never said a word about it, because he thought nobody would believe him. Not that anybody would, but still. And Queenie, who didn’t have so much to do with Newt, will feel awful seeing her husband and her sister grieving for Newt. The pain will last forever, until the last of you finds eternal rest.’

Again, I shake my head. I’m not going to give in.

‘Don’t try to deny that you’ll never fall to eternal slumber. Everyone will, even I will, whatever the cause may be. You can kill me, but that’s not going to bring your dear Mommy back. You’re never going to get your Mommy back, whatever you do. Those Deathly Hallows are just legends. And even if it was true, the Stone of Resurrection won’t bring Mommy back either. Maybe for mere minutes, but he’ll never be the same again. The torture has damaged his soul permanently.’

For the thousandths time in the last one and a half week, I’m convinced that if I could cry, I’d be crying every last drop of liquid out.

‘You’ll never be able to let your dear Mommy go. And you know that.’

My mind screams at me not to give in to Grindelwald’s mind tricks. It screams at me not to be hurt by his words, how true they may be, but it doesn’t work. Grindelwald is right, and there’s nothing to do about it. The only choice I have, is to accept that he’s right. I’m never going to get Mommy back, and I’ll have to learn to live with it.

‘The words are sinking in, aren’t they? Good. But mark my words, Niffler; I’ll never let you go. I’ll always haunt your dreams. I’ll always remind you that you’ll never be able to let go of your Mommy.’

***

‘Little buddy, wake up.’ Queenie shakes me slightly. ‘We’re going out for a walk, and I think you should go with us. You need to have some distraction from Newt. That’s the only thing you think about. Come, love.’

Overcome with sleep, I let Queenie pick me up. With me in her arms, she walks outside where Tina and Jacob are waiting for us.


End file.
